Our Mission Statement

When my husband and I were attending our pre-marriage counseling, our counselor recommended that we create a mission statement for our marriage. We took this suggestion seriously and wrote up a short, yet meaningful statement that summarized our hopes and dreams for our future together. On our wedding night, my husband presented me with a beautiful gift that displayed pictures of us, as well as a poetic description of why he loved me (I inserted my own reasons for why I love him later on) and in the center was our mission statement. This picture frame hangs in our bedroom as a daily reminder of our love for one another and our commitment to each other. Here’s what it says…

Mission Statement

To reach the fullness of intimacy with God, and with each other, as He intended it to be from the beginning.

To fulfill the first commandment as well as the second, in that order, knowing that in seeking to love God, we will be compelled to love people.

We firmly believe this to be true – that as we seek God first and seek to love Him with everything that we have, love for one another and for the people around us will just naturally follow suit. This thought was included in my wedding vows, in which I stated to Joe that “I covenant to love God first and wholeheartedly, allowing Him to flood my heart with His love for you” and which I also used to exhort my sister in my speech to her on her wedding day…

More than any magnificent treasure, your heart and the love you possess are a priceless gift that only you can give. Today, the greatest piece of wisdom I could offer you is to give that love in wholehearted devotion and adoration to Jesus, loving Him with everything that you possess, falling more deeply in love with the infinite God who will love you more deeply and more intimately than any human being ever could. In doing this, I guarantee that you will have the most incredible marriage you could ever hope to dream of having. For He will fill your heart to overflowing with His love for you and for [your husband] and it will fill your home with the richest, most secure, and enduring love that will stand the tests and challenges of this life.

Yet recently, someone chose to differ with us in their opinion on this subject, arguing that it was entirely possible for a married couple to both love God and be committed to one another but not actually be in love with one another. When my husband and I discussed this later on, we both agreed that this may be a reality for many Christian married couples, but that absolutely DOES NOT mean that it is God’s highest design for marriage and that we would absolutely NOT accept that as a possibility for ours! For if God designed marriage to be an earthly example of the passionate love that Jesus the heavenly Bridegroom would have for His Bride, the Church and vice versa, then we do not want to settle for anything less than that! In our mission statement, we declared that we desired to have intimacy with God and with each other “as He intended it to be from the beginning” – meaning, we desire to have the same level of unhindered, innocent, pure love that Adam & Eve experienced with one another and with God in the garden of Eden before the fall into sin.

Secondly, it seems to be an oxymoron to think that it’s possible to be completely in love with Jesus and pursuing intimacy with Him, yet be unmoved and unchanged in your heart towards the people in your life that He loves with the same intensity and passion that He loves you! Now, I know that I am not walking in this nearly to the degree that I would hope, but if I see that I have a dull, cold heart towards my spouse, or my children, or the people I encounter on a day-to-day basis, then I need to seriously challenge where my heart is at with the Lord! I believe it also needs to be a regular prayer of mine to ask the Lord to fill my heart with His love for people – especially my husband! I am not ignorant to the fact that I am mostly selfish and often reserved in giving love to people, yet this doesn’t change the fact that we are commanded to do so and that it’s truly God’s desire for His Church to walk in levels of love that the world has not seen nor can even understand!

1 Peter 1:22
Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for your brothers, love one another deeply, from the heart.

John 17:23
May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.

In closing, my husband and I took some leadership courses in our church, and one of the topics was on the various kinds of love that people experience in their relationships:

1. I love you “if” – an exchange of requirements; it is a selfish love wanting to get something in return.
2. I love you “because” – conditional on what the other person has, is, or has done.
3. I love you “without condition” – I love you in spite of…whether you change or not. I love you as you are. This is a creative love that produces change in the person that receives it.

Unconditional love is what we receive from God every day and it is truly a love that produces change in us as we receive it from Him. This is the kind of love we want to have in our marriage – a love that is pure and without condition – a love that is creative, producing reciprocal love in the person that it is poured out on, a love that only continues to grow in passion and depth until the day we die or meet Jesus in the sky.

Tips for Fasting

Fasting is often difficult (thank God for the times when its easy!) and the enemy will do just about anything to keep you from it.  Now you may not struggle with the same hurdles that I’ve encountered, but if you’re anything like me, than hopefully you’ll find some of these tips helpful.  Here are a couple things I discovered recently in my attempts at fasting:

1. Set clear guidelines

Almost every time I do a fast, if I don’t set very clear guidelines for the type of fast I’m going to do (and even when I do), I am always tempted to bend the rules or make excuses to get out of it.  For example, I know that I want to fast in some way on a particular day, but I am indecisive about what kind of fast I’ll be doing – will I go on water only?  Will I allow myself to drink juice?  Will I say no solids, but any type of liquid?  Will I say just fruits and vegetables? No sweets?  One meal?  etc.  If I don’t make a clear decision on what I’m doing, I’ll end up fasting nothing!  Or, if I say I’m going to fast and I start off thinking I’ll do water only, by mid-morning I’m allowing myself some juice, by lunch I’m having a milky, sugary, caffeinated latte, by supper time I decide I’ll let myself have a bowl of soup and then by the end of the day I’m having a big plate of nachos with cheese and salsa before bed!  Now, there is always grace and this is not a regimented religious exercise where you have to follow strict rules – it’s about your heart – but you’re really cheating yourself of entering into the voluntary weakness of fasting if you don’t give yourself clear boundaries for your fast and seek to do your best to follow them.

2. Have accountability

Now, we know we’re not supposed to broadcast our fasting to the world and the general rule is that it’s between you and God and nobody else needs to know about it.  By flaunting your fast to the public, you are receiving your reward on earth for a few moments, but losing your eternal reward in heaven.  At the same time, I believe it is super helpful to have one person, like your spouse or a close friend, that you tell what kind of fast you are doing and then ask them to keep you accountable!  If my husband has no idea that I have intentions to fast on a certain day, I am 100% more likely to break my fast than if I know that he knows.  Even if he’s not around to see me, it’ll be in the back of mind that he might ask me how my fast is going and that might be just enough to keep me from eating that ice cream sandwich.  Now hopefully we would fear the Lord more than man and fast with the knowledge that He is always watching and sees everything, but if you need that extra little help, I would suggest telling just one person and give them permission to ask you about it!

3. Have a prayer plan

I remember the first time I heard teaching on fasting as a youth where the speaker said that “fasting without prayer is dieting”.  While I believe there is still value in fasting when you’re just gritting your teeth through it and prayer is farthest from your mind, this is definitely not God’s highest for fasting.  Fasting without prayer is mostly starving yourself for no reason.  The goal or purpose is to spend the time you would normally give to preparing food and eating and use it to sit at Jesus’ feet in communion with Him.  How this looks will be different for everyone – perhaps you’ll read your Bible and simply meditate on the Word, perhaps you’ll do a study on a certain topic in the Bible, perhaps you’ll spend time in worship and adoration, or you might like to focus that time on interceding for the needs of others.  Whatever it looks like, there should be some form of prayerful communing with God.  But for me, the same as having clear guidelines for the type of fast I’ll be doing, if I don’t have a plan of action for my time with the Lord, chances are I’ll play games on my computer while I’m skipping lunch!  Not having a plan makes me feel a little lost, so it’s often a good idea to have a scripture picked out that I want to read, or a specific topic I’ve been wanting to study, or a list of needs I want to pray about.

That’s it for now – if I come across more stumbling blocks to fasting (which I’m sure I will), then I’ll be sure to write about what I find helpful to overcoming them in a future post!

Urges, Cravings & Impulses

What is a fasted lifestyle?
Living a fasted lifestyle is about much more than just fasting food, it’s also about living a surrendered life in the areas of food, our finances and our time.  Fasting is voluntary weakness – choosing weakness on our own accord for the sake of love.  This can include fasting food, or it could mean living a simpler life financially so that you are able to give more money away or so that you are able to work less and give more time to prayer, or it could mean choosing to give up the time you spend watching your favorite TV show in order to spend time reading your Bible.  All of these are forms of living a fasted lifestyle – making choices to live our lives by the Spirit which will surely cause us to feel weak (in other words – grumpy, hungry, or discontent) by not satisfying the desires of our flesh.

“Yield”
In this post, I wanted to talk about one way to live a fasted lifestyle, which is to be wary of giving in to urges, cravings and impulses.  In life, you will both need & desire certain foods, possessions and activities.  Yet it takes discernment to know when these are the growling of the flesh.  This is definitely not an easy thing to discern since our desires can often overpower our ability to hear the voice of the Holy Spirit clearly. Lately however, this topic has really come to the forefront in my pregnancy, since as a pregnant woman, you are constantly validated in your cravings and encouraged to satisfy them.  This is so tempting to listen to!  I’m essentially being told to give in to whatever whimsy or fancy I have for any type of food at any time!  I truly don’t understand the logic in this, when it’s clearly not healthy or beneficial for my well-being or the baby’s (unless I’m craving vegetables)?  Yet this mindset is prevalent throughout society in ALL areas!  We are constantly being told to give in to our urges and impulses for that big juicy steak, or that big screen TV, or tickets to the latest popular event.  “Eat, drink, and be merry!  Spend, spend, spend!!! Relax and enjoy yourself for a few hours – you deserve it!”  I have an especially vivid memory of a huge McDonald’s billboard with a gigantic picture of their irresistable fries (my personal favorite) with one simple word – “Yield”!

“Their god is their stomach”
But how do we combat these messages that bombard us on a daily basis??  I think a part of our answer lies in Philippians 3.  In verses 18-19, Paul mentions those who are enemies of the cross of Christ – now, this may mean unbelievers, but earlier in the chapter he talks about sharing in the sufferings of Christ, so I believe it could also refer to believers who aren’t willing to enter into the fellowship of His sufferings – and goes on to describe that “Their destiny is destruction, their god is their stomach, and their glory is in their shame. Their mind is on earthly things.“  So, if we don’t want our stomach to be our god or the desires of our flesh to control us, then it is imperative that our vision be fixed on what is eternal and not what is earthly.  In this same chapter Paul speaks of where he has chosen to focus his gaze – “Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”  He is looking to Jesus and looking to heaven – to that which is eternal and lasting – instead of the temporary and fleeting pleasures of that Big Mac I crave, or the newest fashion trend I itch to have, or the urge inside to waste my time with the empty fascination of a television show.

It’s a battle
There is a spiritual battle being waged for my heart and I feel the pull of these things hourly!  Where will I choose to give my energy, money and time?  Will I give in to the urges, cravings and impulses of my flesh?  On what and on whom will I choose to fix my gaze?  Will I live for what it fading away or for what will last forever?  The spirit fights against the flesh and right now, the flesh is winning out.  This needs to change and I need to get a violent zeal within me that will scream “NOOOOO!!!” to the world’s command to “Yield”.

The Scoffing Spirit

First of all, you must understand that in the last days scoffers will come, scoffing and following their own evil desires. They will say, “Where is this ‘coming’ he promised? Ever since our fathers died, everything goes on as it has since the beginning of creation”…But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance. But the day of the Lord will come like a thief…2 Peter 3:3-4,8-10

The Scoffing Spirit
Today at Sanctuary House of Prayer, the message shared began in 2 Peter 3 with a warning about our susceptibility to be influenced by the scoffing spirit of this age. The speaker went on to describe the danger of this spirit’s ability to clutter our fervency and leave us unknowingly dull. This provoked me to write about our need to combat this spirit with a holy violence in our lives.

What I “Knew” About the End-Times
Now, if you have never thought about the Second Coming of Jesus or if you’ve sort of avoided the topic because it seemed too difficult to understand, or perhaps a little scary, then you’re not alone.  Since I was a child, I had a fascination with the topic of the end-times and the book of Revelation, but I had absolutely no understanding on it and nobody around me seemed to either.  The only things I remember ever being taught or hearing about the end-times and the return of Christ to the earth was that:

1. The book of Revelation is far too difficult to interpret so leave it alone.
2. He is going to come when we aren’t expecting it so don’t bother trying to figure out when He might be coming.
3. Everyone who has ever thought Jesus was coming soon was wrong, so basically don’t expect Him to come in your life time (so taking point #2 into consideration, if I’m not expecting Him to come, wouldn’t that mean He’s probably coming? ).
4. If it does happen to occur in your life and for some reason you don’t get raptured with the rest of the saints, all you need to remember is DON’T TAKE THE MARK OF THE BEAST!!

One of Them
Now I don’t have time to refute each of these in this post, but, needless to say, my eschatology (end-times theology) was pretty limited, mostly ignorant and a little fearful.  To add to my struggle, I would often have dreams relating to the end-times and Jesus’ return, and since I believe that God speaks vividly and prophetically through our dreams, I was troubled by them and didn’t know what to make of them.  You can imagine the wrestling match I endured when I found out the man I was dating and knew I was going to marry began to tell me that he believed with all of his heart that Jesus would return in his life time!! I was appalled, confused, offended, angry, afraid, and embarrassed, to mention just a few of the emotions I felt!  I began to argue the four points above with great passion (mostly #2) and at that time in my life, was pretty much one of the scoffers mentioned in 2 Peter 3.

Dull & Slumbering
Sadly, my passionate conviction that we couldn’t know when Jesus was coming and that it was heretical to even think you knew when he might be coming was birthed by a scoffing spirit found not in the world, but within the church herself.  The very bride of Christ who is described in the book of Revelation as partnering with the Holy Spirit and crying out for Jesus to return to the earth, this same bride didn’t seem to believe He was actually coming!  Or at least, not likely in their life time, which is exactly what the speaker meant when he said that this scoffing spirit will leave us “unknowningly dull”.  If we buy into the lie of the enemy – whether it’s coming from the church or from the world – our hearts will become dull and listless and slumbering, for there is little reason to prepare for something you don’t expect to happen.

How then should we live?
Peter goes on in his letter to encourage the body of Christ, that in light of their firm belief in Jesus’ return (he was writing on the assumption that this was so), that it was absolutely vital that they prepare their hearts for what was coming!  Since it was absolutely certain that He was going to come back and that He was coming not just to sweep His bride off the planet, but to also bring judgment upon sin, Peter gave them the answer to the looming question of, “So what kind of people ought we to be?“  We must be asking this same question of ourselves – in light of this knowledge, how should we live our lives?  What kind of bride is He coming back for?  How do we need to prepare?  Peter’s answer was this…”live holy and godly lives as you look forward to the day of God and speed its coming…make every effort to be found spotless, blameless and at peace with him…be on your guard so that you may not be carried away by the error of lawless men and fall from your secure position. But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.”

On Guard
We need to be on our guard against this spirit that would seek to steal away our hope and belief in the second coming of Jesus.  Yet, let’s take it one step further, and instead of just being on the defensive, take the offense and wage war against it!! If you don’t know what you believe about the end-times and Jesus’ return, then start digging into the scriptures and start asking those hard questions. Wrestle out your beliefs, do your research, argue it out with someone, truly examine the Word!  Then make every effort to firmly stand your ground against anyone who would try to lure you into to being carried away by their unbelief.  Seek understanding, but most importantly, seek to know Jesus and who He is and surrender to His desire to make you into the pure, spotless and blameless bride He is coming back for.

---

For a good place to start researching and asking questions about the end-times, check out the onething forums at the International House of Prayer’s website or check out the book End Times Simplified by David Sliker.

Fasting for those who can't fast!

Unable to Fast?
As much as I sometimes hate fasting and find it very difficult to do, I also think it’s one of our most precious gifts from the Lord for tenderizing our hearts and helping us to draw near to Him.  So when I became pregnant and fasting became a big “no, no” for the baby’s health & safety, I felt like I was missing out!  Part of me was rejoicing that I had an excuse not to fast while the other part of me was mourning the loss of it.

Someone Help Me!
So here I am, several months pregnant, and wishing I had some moms to talk to and give me advice from their experiences.  I have so many questions, like “Did you fast anything while you were pregnant?” and if so, “What kinds of fasting did you do?” and “Did you feel like it had the same impact for your heart?”  I want to know if there are ways that I can fast while pregnant or breastfeeding, whether involving food or not, that will still allow me to enter into the benefits for my heart that fasting provides.  Should I fast computer time?  Should I fast sweets?  Is it okay to do a Daniel type fast, eating only fruits and vegetables for a day?  What have other pregnant women done who wanted to still have an element of fasting in their spiritual lives?

Forging a new path
I expressed this to my husband and he reminded me of a sermon we had once listened to where the speaker was exhorting the people in the audience who were looking for a spiritual mentor to consider that God may want them to be one!  Could it be, that while I am wishing I had someone to show me the way that the Lord would actually want me to forge a new path?  Instead of waiting for someone to tell me how to do it, perhaps I should seek the answers myself and be a voice to others with the same questions as me!  This definitely challenges me, as I wish there was an easier way, yet I’ll get nowhere if I just sit and wait for someone else to seek God and then share with me what they found!  I have a few precious months left in this pregnancy to allow God to teach me new things in the area of fasting and I don’t want to let them go to waste.

Share your ideas
At the same time, if you have found your way to this blog, I’d love to hear any thoughts or suggestions that you may have on the topic!  Go ahead and leave a comment & perhaps I’ll try your idea!