Outstanding Among Ten Thousand

For a rather vulnerable glimpse into my life, lately I have been thinking a lot about being pregnant and wishing I had a life in the process of creation within me. This is in part due to the dozens of pregnant women and new mothers around me. I also think it is because Joe & I have been married now for a year and I am actually in a position where having a baby is not completely out of the question. We have a house and room to grow. Not only this, but as a young woman who is nearing her quarter-century birthday in the coming year, the timing seems good for starting a family. I also think that my motherly instincts are beginning to blossom along with the simple continuous longing for a child to call my own.

Taking all this into consideration, I also do not actually feel ready to be a mother and I really want to make the most of our married years where it is just the two of us, before the pressures and responsibilities of parenthood dramatically change our lifestyles. This then requires patience and trusting in God’s perfect timing and knowing that He has a plan for us and our future family. Yet, I still can’t help feeling a sadness when I dream about having a baby, only to wake up and discover that it isn’t real.

With all of this on my heart, I was reminded of Hannah from 1 Samuel. She too had a desperate longing for a child, but she was barren. She had the adoration and devotion of her husband, but she was not satisfied with this. Her desire was so intense that it drove her to depression and not eating. She was almost obsessed with her dream of having a child and could think of nothing else. Her husband, who loved her dearly, however, was wounded by this and asked her, “Don’t I mean more to you than ten sons?” I think this caused her to think and consider her dream. As she was praying, she presented her request before God, asking Him again to give her a son, but then she did something very dramatic. She “sacrificed” this dream that was so close to her heart and vowed that she would give her son back to the Lord for all the days of his life. She let go of her greatest desire and surrendered it back to God.

I can’t help but think that perhaps the Lord sometimes asks me, “Don’t I mean more to you than…?” (fill in the blank) – a child, a career, a position, friends, my spouse, family, ministry, possessions, etc. Sometimes I can get so focused on my dreams that I neglect what I already have. I fix my gaze on the desires in my heart and forget about the most important thing – I have the very Creator of the universe to call my husband, my Father, my best friend, my Savior, my Helper! He is sooooo much more to me than any of those things could ever be!!

This then reminded me of the verse in Song of Songs 5:10 which says, “My lover is radiant and ruddy, outstanding among ten thousand.” I have mostly thought of this in the perspective of considering the Lord’s beauty and that He is more beautiful than all others. But then I began to think about it in the context of my dreams and desires – the ones most dear to my heart, the good, even God-planted dreams. I sat down at the piano with my Bible and began to sing everything that I was feeling and sing from the Word as a way of expressing my heart to God. And what came out of it? A song – very simple, nothing fancy – but nevertheless, it impacted me.

“You mean more to me than ten thousand dreams.
You mean more to me than any fulfilled fantasy.”

So…do I have what it takes to surrender my dreams the way Hannah did? I hope so. In all truth and sincerity, I believe that the Lord is enough. He is more than enough! And without Him, none of those things could ever come close to satisfying me. He is truly outstanding among ten thousand! And we have the privilege of knowing the end of Hannah’s story (although our own eludes us) – after she gave her dream back to God, He answered her cries and gave her a son, Samuel. She remained true to her promise and gave her son to the service of God in the temple, even though it was very difficult to do. Yet, the Lord gave back to her 5 times what she gave up and He blessed her with 3 more sons and 2 daughters! Plus, Samuel became an extremely influential man of God who heard the voice of the Lord and played a major role in the life of King David, from whose line would come the Savior of the world. Wow!

When we give up something for God, I believe it so moves His heart with love for us that He can’t help but pour out so much blessing on us. The smallest movement of our hearts towards Him in acts of voluntary love for Him strikes His heart and He is ravished by us, by just one glance of our eyes. (Song of Songs 4:9)

Pearl of Great Price

Matthew 13:45-46 (NKJV)
Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant seeking beautiful pearls, who, when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had and bought it.

1 Corinthians 6:19-21 (NIV)
…You are not your own; you were bought at a price…

Hosea 3:1-3 (The Message)
Then God ordered me, “Start all over: Love your wife again, your wife who’s in bed with her latest boyfriend, your cheating wife. Love her the way I, God, love the Israelite people, even as they flirt and party with every god that takes their fancy.”
I did it. I paid good money to get her back. It cost me the price of a slave. Then I told her, “From now on you’re living with me. No more whoring, no more sleeping around. You’re living with me and I’m living with you.”

Genesis 2:18 (NIV)
The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

Hosea 2:14, 16, 19-20 (NIV)
“Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her…In that day,” declares the Lord, “you will call me ‘my husband’; you will no longer call me ‘my master.’  I will betroth you to me forever; I will betroth you in righteousness and justice, in love and compassion. I will betroth you in faithfulness, and you will acknowledge the Lord.”

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Picture with me, if you will, a woman standing on an auction block. She is dirty, bruised, and her clothes are torn, barely covering her. She will go to the highest bidder and become their possession, their slave. She doesn’t look like she’s worth the starting bid and nobody seems interested in purchasing her. The auctioneer would be just as happy to see her die and cares little for her life. When nobody responds to his attempts to sell her, he is ready to discard her and move on to more promising wares.But then a man approaches him and beckons him to come over for a private deal. He is obviously very wealthy, clothed in rich garments, smelling of sweet perfumes, and handsome in appearance. The auctioneer’s prospects immediately brighten and he prepares to bargain.

The man asks, “How much for her?” pointing to the prostitute that nobody else wanted.

The auctioneer purred with his best salesman tactics, “Oh, her? You couldn’t possibly afford her!”

The man persists, “Name your price.”

Anybody knows it’s best to start high and then work your way down. “Everything you own!!” The auctioneer exclaims extravagantly.

Without a moment’s hesitation, the man declares, “Done!” and extends his hand to seal the deal.

The auctioneer blinks, stunned. Did he hear right? The man looks completely serious and ready to give it all for this soiled dove. The auctioneer becomes suspicious. Is there something he doesn’t know about her? He decides to find out.”All right…but before we write up the papers, may I ask you a question? What makes her of such value to you?”

The man smiles slightly and gazes over at the young woman who is standing, shoulders slumped, head down.

“I’ve been looking for some time now, in search of beautiful pearls. As soon as I saw her, I realized that my search was over, for in her I have found a pearl of great price! Can you not see how priceless she is?”

The auctioneer looks again to make sure they are speaking about the same woman. Indeed, they are viewing the same broken, filthy whore. He is lost for words, bewildered by the man’s words. “Why don’t you tell me what makes her so priceless?” Hoping to discover the secret of her identity.

The man’s smile grows. His gaze is directed at the woman and yet it appears that he is seeing a completely different scene in his mind’s eye.

“She is radiant. She is altogether lovely. She is stunning and captivating. With one glance of her eyes, she has stolen my heart! She is worth the greatest price you could name, and more! You could not put a price on her beauty!”

“She is unique, perfect in every way. There is none like her! She is purity, she is grace, she is strength. She is a rose, a lily among thorns, a diamond in the rough, the wheat among the weeds. She is elegant, nurturing, dedicated, affectionate and stately. There is no flaw or blemish in her!”

“I’m sorry to interrupt, that’s all very poetic, but may I remind you that she is a slave and a adulteress?” The auctioneer forgot his salesman’s tactics for a moment in order to satisfy his curiosity. The man turned to him.

“Yes, I know. She is bruised, but I will heal her. She is broken-hearted, but I will bind up her wounds. She might call me ‘Master’ for some time, but one day, she will call me ‘husband’.” The man returned his gaze to the object of his affection.

“Yes…because I am going to allure her. I will speak tenderly to her and restore to her all that she has lost. I will betroth her to myself forever.”

“Pardon?? You plan to marry this woman? Surely a man of your stature and position deserves a woman of royalty and wealth! She cannot be worthy to stand next to you as your wife!”

Fear flamed up inside the auctioneer’s soul at the look the man turned on him. A look of jealous rage burned in his eyes with fierceness and passion. The auctioneer quickly determined to be more careful with his words.

“You are quite mistaken,” came the carefully controlled words of the man, “She is in fact royalty and comes from the highest birth. Only she doesn’t know it.” Aha! Things were starting to come together at last! Foolishly, this man thought this woman was somehow a princess, kidnapped and sold into slavery as a child! Oh the irony! He was going to waste everything on her! He returned his attention to the man, who was still speaking.

“She is certainly worthy to be my bride. I will wash away her filth and dress her in garments of pure white. She will be my partner, my suitable companion, and she will love me with the same intense love that I have for her. She will be the light of the world, the salt of the earth. Nothing I own could possibly compare with the endless pleasure that she will bring me for eternity. I consider all that I would give up for her to be rubbish in comparison to the joy that I will gain by winning her heart! I would give it all to have her, indeed I must have her!”

“And you will, sir,” purred the auctioneer again, back on his game, “For the price that we agreed on!”

“I’m a man of my word. I will pay you what I promised.”

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And he did pay the greatest price. He made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, giving up the glory and riches of heaven, giving up his close intimate position with the Father, setting aside the privileges of deity and the advantages of his status to come to earth and become human! (Philippians 2:6-8) He humbled himself, washing the feet of those who followed him, to show them the full extent of his love for them. (John 13:1-5) And from there he continued his selfless abandonment with the most extravagant display of his love – he gave his very life and died a cruel death on a cross. And while he hung there, it was her face, the image of his bride that was the joy set before him and which enabled him to endure the cross and scorn the shame. (Hebrews 12:2) Yet, what makes it so incredible is that he considered his bride to be worth the price! He considered all these things to not be of equal value to having her for his own, and enjoying the benefits of her voluntary love. She is indeed priceless.

Song of Songs 8:7 (NIV)
If one were to give all the wealth of his house for love, it would be utterly scorned.